self-portrait.

December 2007.

Palenque, Chiapas, Mexico.

In this picture I am about six weeks pregnant with Solo. Mr. P & I were at the end of a 3 week backpacking trip through southern Mexico, Guatemala, Honduras & Belize. Here, I am on the verge of the most life-changing experience I may ever encounter. Yet, I hadn't a clue just how much life would change, how much I would change. How there would come moments, days, weeks, months, years, when I would be hardly recognizable. Laying aside self for the tiny human depending on me. Relinquishing self to an illness set out to rob me.

Eventually, I reached the point determined to discover again the woman in this picture. The lover of nature, adventure, travel. The explorer of people, culture, language. The thinker, the writer, the wife, the friend.

And now I've come full circle. I'm at the beginning of an experience, caring for our second tiny human, that I really have no idea how much will change our lives. And, for a season, it may be hard to recognize that woman in the picture as me - with dark circles under my eyes, spit up on my shoulder, hands full of a noodly infant.

But, this time around, there is the confident knowledge that she'll be back. She'll be changed, for sure, in ways that are still unknown, but that woman up there? She's still in there somewhere.